Squirrels

Taz here, 

You may notice that it's a Friday, and typically we update on a Wednesday. Rebellious, aren't I? 

Well actually, my excuses are sorta the opposite of rebellious. I was... 

STUDYING. 

So sue me, I study sometimes. My Leaving Cert is only two years away! 

(On a side note I'm told regularly my sarcasm is atrocious (On another side note atrocious is a really fun word to say (atrocious))) 

Actually I have my TY summer exams, which unfortunately involves higher level math and Irish, and do you ever just want to please your teachers? Like, "Admittably you may think I suck but I tried really hard in this test and I'M WORTHY AND CAPABLE OF BIG GIRL MATHS." You know what I mean? 

Of course you do. You always get me, random stranger nodding empathetically at your computer screen. 

What I actually planned to write about, before I started RANDOMLY RAMBLING oh jesus I'm so hilarious like seriously you did not see that coming hahaha literally tears was how exams have been given a stupendously stupid amount of power over our lives. 

Like really, for most of us, our entire career can depend on our ability to memorize information. Not our ability to run a business, not our bedside manner, not even our intelligence, in all honestly. When whether or not you get a job is determined by the months you spend muddling through the Shakespearean language, there may be a problem. If we were to take out a calculator and start adding up every single hour you've spent over your entire lifespan studying, then take away the time you spent studying the stuff you would one day use? It's a frighteningly large number. 

Think about that. Now think about squirrels. Squirrels, in my opinion, have pretty good lives. They eat and hibernate and get awww-ed at by passerbyers, though not in that particular order. I don't know about you, but at times when I'm sitting in an exam hall, on one chair with one table in rows of chairs and tables, I think about who else in the world  is also taking an exam at this very moment, and combined how many hours did we ALL spend studying, and who of us will pass and who will fail and what it'll mean for our lives and jesusthat'salotofchairsandtables but more importantly, squirrels. 

When did humans make lives so complicated? Wouldn’t it just be simpler to carry food in our cheeks ("for later," we'd tell the waitress) and sleep for really long periods of time and just be squirrels? Enda Kenny is fabulous and everything, but once I'm old enough to vote? The Taoiseach I'll be campaigning for will be of the rodent kind. 

atrocious